physical therapy starts soon!!!

week 1 of 24 hasn't started out here

the path is still unclear

but soon the fire lights

and then this simple spark

inside myself ignites

the smell of the pitch

rubber artificial turf and grass

from the first touch they say I can take

I'll be waiting for the next time I can make a pass.

The beautiful game drew me in as a child. I remember vaguely the world cup 94 and a little better the youth teams we split our age group up into before town soccer began. I was one of the fastest kids on the field, asthmatic as hell though and unaware of a deviated sceptum, so my shifts were shorter but I fought for every last ball and slid to win any ball, didn't have to be a 50-5o.. you dribble by kicking the ball too far ahead of you? I'm going to get the ball, you may get wrecked but I'm going to get up and keep playing unless a whistle is blown. The amount I cared about EVERY single game astounds me to this day. The excitement of a new pair of cleats, even if they were usually just the next year's adidas model, nothing too crazy. The thrill of playing goalie and making saves, keeping a match under control. Defense, a more physical side of the sport that relies on good depth perception, communication, strength of body and mind and VISION. As a defender you see the whole field. Call for a pass if you see the run being made- make that insane run down the left line hoping for the 1-2 or give-n-go to either send in a ball or blast a shot.

So many happy memories. The final memories I have before this while ligament situation are solid. I scored that game, we won, I was playin hard and having fun. I got hurt. Now, I can get myself back up, buy into this PT routine 100% and work so hard to not just get back but get back better.

There are many more memories yet to be made with myself and the beautiful game. While there has been distance, the truth is it never left me. Futbol is a part of me, I feel off because I havent had that outlet. I need to throw myself into academics, coaching, writing, and maybe trying to make music.

I felt miserable earlier this evening, it's now 4AM and I AM WIDE AWAKE. FUCK.

ambiens don't work, built up a tolerance.

ITS THE YEAR OF THE TIGER!!!

I'm a Dragon. What this means? right now dont ccare, gotta try to sleep before the su comes up