It's 12:34 AM. That time gets me. It's like catching 9:11 or 11:11. You just have some sort of electrical synapse in your brain that registers those numbers on the clock. It's starting off a rough semester, I have pressure piled way way high over me but I need to rise above and not only can I, but I will.

It's time to be done with all of the self-fulfilling prophecy that is depression. Feel like shit, don't want to go out. Stuck in alone, feel awful. But when you do venture out into the uncomfortable world of parties, remember- there are always spots withing said parties that are more your scene. You don't need to be on the dancefloor (especially with that leg) but thats not the point. the point is life is the sum of all your experiences, and if you prevent yourself from exiting your comfort zone, taking that step outside the shell we all create around ourselves is a liberating feeling.

Nobody wants to get hurt, but without putting shit on the line, there's nothing to hurt but yourself, with the plague of regret. Fuck regret, can't live in yesterday.

I never practice what I preach but writing really does help me get some of these thoughts out that I don't voice to other people. I'm usually too busy spouting off nonsene or some story because I have a problem with talking too much.

I'm just as insecure, scared, as much of a nervous wreck as anyone else. It all comes down to how well you hide it, and when and who you decide to show those other sides of yourself to.

It's late, I have shit to do before class so I can feel good about myself.

Until next time faithful readers.

Cheers,

-M"D"C